"the last time"

It is that melancholy time again;

giving up my freedoms

for knowledge that I have already given myself,

the structure that I crave but the prison that I loathe-

no time to help others

because the glass wall is up

and I try, I really do,

but focus is either too much

or never enough

so instead I try to gaze at the night sky

and measure the distance between stars

and I allow my gaze to rest

on broken perfume bottles

and my nose to breathe in dead roses

instead of the hallways where I met those I love the most

and those who hate me the most,

where I tried my best

and where rivers streamed down my face when I didn’t;

this is the last time.